Busy, Busy, Busy

School has started and I feel like I have been running around like a chicken with my head cut off! The first few weeks of school are always total chaos, I get stressed, and I feel exhausted. All three things lead add up to bad news on the health front.

Though I have to say I am proud of myself. Thanks to my mom, I actually had healthy food choices when my family got together on Saturday. We had angel food cake, fresh strawberries, and low fat ice cream to celebrate. Of course the last few days have started out well and ended well but the middle ground was a bit shaky. I have managed to walk for an hour two days in a row but my food choices have not been very desirable. I have been living off of carbs and not good ones.

Now if I can only get my food and exercise to match up again I will be doing good. Though I do have to say I think I made a bit of a break through in mind set. After listening to 4 hours of "What Not to Wear" on TLC, while working on lesson planning, I finally understood that the number in your clothes don't matter. It is okay to need a size 12 in some jeans and wear a size 8 skirt. That sometimes you can buy a medium but other times you are gonna have to get that large so it looks good. It is not about the number it is all about the fit.

I guess I have put alot of faith in a number. For so long I had always imagined that a size 10 would be my perfect size and wearing mostly 12's has about driven me crazy. Being so close and yet so far away. But this weekend I decided that being a 12 is alright as long as I am active, healthy, and look amazing in my clothes. :)

I Did It!!

I am so proud of myself!

I haven't been running in quite a while and yesterday I decided that I was going to start again. My friend Kathy wants me to run in a 10k in November, don't think that is possible, but I told her I would run in a 5k this fall and maybe a 10k this spring if she would run with me. Meaning she would have to slow waaaaaaayyyyy down.

Well I got on the treadmill last night and ran an entire mile. So it took me 18 minutes but still did it without stopping. I am getting ready to get on and do a mile and a quarter tonight.

The plan is I am going to keep it at this slow pace and work my way up to 3.5 miles. Once I can run 3.5 slow and confidently then I will start bumping up the speed a little at a time. I think that is a totally do able plan.

Other good news I dropped the 5 pounds I gained on vacation!! So I have my other 15 that I gained over the summer to lose now.

Dieting Doom

Today I watched a show where they were talking about 3 factors that doom every dieter. First is peer influance. If a dieter is around people who eat more then they tend to give themselves permission to eat more as well. Second was temptation is greater for a dieter than it is for someone who is not a dieter. Dieter's tend to be people who will continue to eat past when they are full just because it is there. The factor was stress. Many people will use food to calm themselves when they are stressed and therefore they will over eat. They said that the only difference between a dieter and a non-dieter is their mindset.

As I watched the program I realized they were talking about me. I face each of these three factors every single day. I have struggled everyday of my life with a dieters mentality. After two years of working so hard to lose the weight I still struggle. I don't know how to change this mentality. How do I allow myself to enjoy what I want but to stop when I have had enough. I am still learning how to make healthy choices and still allow myself to enjoy those things I would normally consider temptations in moderation.

I guess the question becomes what is moderation?

Winning After Losing

Yesterday I was watching Oprah. It was one of those reunion shows where they bring people back that have been on before. Well over the last 20 years she has been following a woman who when they first met her in 1987 was 25 and weight over 500 pounds. I can't remember the woman's name, but over the course of the last 20 years she has struggled over and over again. She finally had gastric bypass and lost over 300 pounds. Since then she has written a book called Winning After Losing. Basically from what I could tell it is her story and the stories of others who have lost big amounts of weight and how they have been able to keep it off.

It is a struggle that is for sure! So I think I am going to buy the book just to see how other people have managed to maintain their weight loss. You know I am grateful to those who have been fit their entire lives and they want to help other people, but I think advice from someone who has walked the path I now walk is so much better. People who have been thin their entire lives have no clue how much of a battle everyday becomes when you use food as your drug of choice.

As for today I did alright but not my best. For some reason I have been craving sweets like crazy and fruit is not cutting it. I probably should have gone without the peanut butter and honey that I ate after dinner tonight but it did get rid of the sweet tooth. I also didn't do any exercise though I did steam clean my carpets and lugging the cleaner around made me break a sweat!

So tomorrow is another day. I can do this! I am going geocaching in the morning so that will give me some exercise!

Half and Half

So I did pretty good with eating today.
I had my typical yogurt and fruit for breakfast.
A protein bar for snack
Ate at Penguin Ed's BBQ for lunch and had a Poke Salad. I did eat blue cheese dressing but you need a little fat.
Had an apple, protein bar, and sugar free Jello for a snack.
Then a turkey sandwich made on Ezekiel Bread with soy cheese for dinner.
I also had a sugar free Popsicle and another protein bar later.

I didn't exercise though. I came home with a bad headache so I just laid down for a while. Then I got started on house work. I am sooooo behind on that!

So one day at a time that is all I can do!

Vacation Time!

I have been gone for the last 5 days on vacation. It was great and I actually got quite a bit of exercise between hiking, swimming, and digging for diamonds. However the I have found the study that says your friends can make you fat is true. Being around people all weekend who don't eat as healthy as I do tends to cause me to eat really badly. It is always amazing to me that when you are around bad influences you tend to fall in their direction instead of raising them up to your good influence.

Oh well, it was a vacation and I enjoyed myself. So back to the grind tomorrow and now I have a couple more pounds that I have to lose! Okay, I should have been back to the grind today but I kind of messed that up when PTA catered our lunch today! Why is it that when people fix dinner and things for people very rarely is it healthy food?

The Last Two Days

I am not even going to attempt to write about my day at Silver Dollar City. Somewhere between the Salt Water Taffy and the Pecan Pie I did an awful lot of walking and eating. Though I think that riding roller coasters should count as a cardio workout because my heart felt like it was about to beat out of my chest!

Today was actually a good day.

I ate Ezekiel cereal, blueberries and soy milk for breakfast.
Had an yogurt and protein bar for snack
Had sauteed veggies and tofu for lunch and impressed the kids with my chopstick skills!
Had and apple, protein bar, and nutri-grain bar as snacks.
A Lean Cuisine for dinner and a brownie rounded out the day.

So other than the brownie and the fact that I should of had a veggie with dinner I did pretty good.

Exercise for today was chasing little kids with a huge water gun. Not your conventional workout but I had fun and my arms were sure tired from pumping that thing!